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Islamic Science Council on high alert to trace Quranic phrase interpretable as ‘gravitational wave’ 
Opinion divided among senior Islamic scientists over possibility of such discovery
Jeddah: The Islamic Science Council (ISC) has been on high alert to trace any Quranic phrase that could be interpreted as ‘gravitational wave’, Khabaristan Times has learnt. The move comes after physicists at Laser Interferometer Gravitational-Wave Observatory (Ligo) yesterday announced the discovery of gravitational waves that are believed to have been first anticipated by Albert Einstein a century ago.
“We’re here on our day off on Friday, and skimming through tafseers to find anything remotely resembling ‘gravitational waves ripples in the fabric of spacetime’” said a senior Islamic scientist,
who is a part of the 27-member team dedicated to coming up with the latest Islamic discovery at the ISC headquarters in Jeddah. “Today is our deadline. This discovery absolutely needs to coincide with Friday, to make it even more authentic,” he added.
Insiders reveal that the Islamic scientists are having a tough time finding the evidence that they need to prove that gravitational waves existence and impact on spacetime was first mentioned and elaborated in the Islamic scriptures. “Gravity itself is impossible to find and so are space and time expressed in unison.” says a veteran scientist who worked on proving that earth isn’t flat in the early 1990s through Islamic interpretations. “
It was quite a task 20 years ago to prove that spheroids can be spread out like carpets, it’s virtually impossible to prove the existence of gravitational waves. I mean there is only so much we can twist, and lie through our teeth,” he added while talking to Khabaristan Times off the record.
However, a senior linguist in the ISC ranks says that gravity has been discussed in detail in the scriptures. “The gravity of one’s sins is repeatedly highlighted,” he said. “All we now need to prove is that his gravity is tangible and hence can be measured if one listened for 20 thousandths of a second through instruments that can identify distortion in spacetime a thousandth the diameter of one atomic nucleus across a 4km strip of laserbeam and mirror,” he added.
The linguist claimed that since hellfire is indisputably palpable and its intensity can be measured as well, the ISC should be able to find the needed verse by midnight today. “The gravity of sins is directly proportional to the punishment and in turn the intensity of the hellfire as well. I’m confident we can find multiple verses proving the existence of waves that one emanates when one is sinning.”
With hours ticking along and deadline looming, the ISC faces a race against time to own the discovery.
“Islam will win the race against spacetime before midnight,” a scientist claimed.
